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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #16  
Old 09-07-2016, 08:44 PM
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squiggle squiggle is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

You should slim down that’s the first thing. As for your studies, try your best to upgrade when you can, regardless of how much you hate it. Just pick a course that you like the most/related to your job. Unless you can start your own business, if not you have no choice but to follow the system as normal people are doing. If you don’t study well, FT will take over your job, then you will left with nothing. Since now Singapore became so competitive. Without money, don’t care how handsome or great qualities you have. Most of the girls will run away from you, because you cannot afford for anything to them.

If you don’t have any big dreams/goals in life and insist to stop studying, simply just sign on to SAF. You can keep fit there and earn stable income.



TS, I also like you without GF till now 25 years old and studies sucks. But now I still continue to endure and work hard. My ultimate goal for life is to get a master degree and a job that I like. As for GF, have have, don't have never mind. I will let fate plan for me, if not just spend on commercial sex will do. Because now the cost of living is so high, I don’t think I have enough to date and start a family later on.
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  #17  
Old 02-08-2016, 05:09 PM
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by TadaoKumagai View Post
Greeting.
Well some may know, some may not know.
I have 0 girlfriend, Single since Birth.

I would like the senior here for advise on how to get expose to more girl.

BTW, I hate Clubbing, Pub and Smoking Environment, it a Triple No for me.

Highest Education "N" Level Only. [I HATE STUDY so Dont Give ADVISE ON STUDY TO GET A BETTER FUTURE, I rather WORK MY ASS OFF]
Physically: OBESE around 88-95 kg

I use various online "free" but not exactly free till you pay to subscribe it or upgrade the member status.....

22 year old this year, sigh... lonely....


Any advise from senior here on what to do ....
You are still young :-) This is the age to chase your dreams and work on your career, explore and find out what you enjoy doing. If you never had sex before and really want to give it a try, by all means go for it. Pay for a session with the prostitute or whatever that floats your boat. Live life with no regrets (but of course keep yourself safe while you are having fun). Along the way, you will meet people. Learn from the good and bad experience and most importantly to love yourself before you love others. When you love yourself, you will be equipped with confidence. Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent!
  #18  
Old 03-08-2016, 11:20 AM
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by Estella View Post
You are still young :-) This is the age to chase your dreams and work on your career, explore and find out what you enjoy doing. If you never had sex before and really want to give it a try, by all means go for it. Pay for a session with the prostitute or whatever that floats your boat. Live life with no regrets (but of course keep yourself safe while you are having fun). Along the way, you will meet people. Learn from the good and bad experience and most importantly to love yourself before you love others. When you love yourself, you will be equipped with confidence. Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent!
Well said..
  #19  
Old 04-08-2016, 04:59 AM
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

A good friend of mine told me that the basic key to find a girlfriend is to show her your true self.

This may sound simple at first, but it's a sentence full of challenges. First and foremost, you must be be able to define to yourself, the very definition of you.

Are you happy with who you are as a person? Could you look at yourself in the mirror every morning and tell to his face that you like what you're looking at?

If you don't, what makes you think any girl should like you?

At 22, most guys would only focus on their looks/appearance/sweet talk, because at that age, that's probably the only thing they could offer/being expected of them. And if you go for girls of your age, their demands would probably still be similar/within reach by guys your age.

Now, you have the choice to either follow the crowd, or offer something else better?

And btw, reduce your masturbating, it's bad for your energy level and bad for your brains either. Use the energy to be more productive in your life. Seriously.
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  #20  
Old 16-08-2016, 09:28 PM
mattrayham mattrayham is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

I tend to be the kinder type when giving advice lah ah...

1. About your obesity - Not sure if it's a genetic issue or more of a lifestyle issue, either way, both can be managed.

Even if it's a genetic issue, with the right lifestyle (good diet, healthy exercise), you can trim down to a more acceptable weight.

Manage your expectations lah... no need to aim for the hunk 6 pack look. A lot of chio bus actually still have BF's who are (acceptably) obese but cute and have funny personality or other factors to make up for it (and not necessarily money either).

Think Chef Benny Se Teo - he's no hunk, can be considered big sized, but what he has is BALLS, that lost thing called MANLINESS.

2. About your education - N Level? So what? You get a degree also no guarantee you get a better life. What you need is just more job experience. Start out with a shitty job first, gain experience, climb the ladder. Best is start with a job where you have to learn to SELL stuff. The hustle and the grind are the best teachers in life.

Find some things that interest you, play with it, learn more about it, develop skills around it, hang around other experts and learn from them.

By the way, I only Diploma holder but now I got company hiring Degree holders. My business deal with something that I didn't learn in Poly, but more of what I pick up myself and learn myself through years of trial and error.

I don't want to inspire you with feel good vibes. All that bullshit. But definitely you still very young chap got a LOT of time and potential.

Other youngsters your age in their 20's wanna earn 4K a month as their entry level job salary but can't compose proper email can't even ask a senior colleague how to do something, let them dream on, with their credit card debts, weekend clubbing, whatever it is youngsters do nowadays.

Do the shit work in your 20's so by your 30's you're living like a King. Don't worry, by the time you hit 30+ you still have enough energy to enjoy the better life that you are hungry for in your 20's - provided you maintain the right lifestyle energy-wise.

Oh ya... notice I didn't mention any tips on how to score girls, dating, etc.

Take it easy... Ladies love men with a purpose. Devote and focus yourself to building yourself to be the better man you are supposed to be (whatever that bullshit means), let girl chasing be a SIDE distraction from time to time.

Don't overstress - I wanna get a girlfriend, I wanna get a girlfriend, I wanna get a girlfriend - just chill and socialise with girls and be (just) friends with girls first.

An irony of life is that sometimes for somethings the MORE you chase something, the MORE it runs away from you, but if you start to chill, focus on your self, etc, some of these things just naturally start to be attracted to you.
  #21  
Old 20-07-2021, 08:51 PM
TadaoKumagai TadaoKumagai is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by mattrayham View Post
I tend to be the kinder type when giving advice lah ah...

1. About your obesity - Not sure if it's a genetic issue or more of a lifestyle issue, either way, both can be managed.

Even if it's a genetic issue, with the right lifestyle (good diet, healthy exercise), you can trim down to a more acceptable weight.

Manage your expectations lah... no need to aim for the hunk 6 pack look. A lot of chio bus actually still have BF's who are (acceptably) obese but cute and have funny personality or other factors to make up for it (and not necessarily money either).

Think Chef Benny Se Teo - he's no hunk, can be considered big sized, but what he has is BALLS, that lost thing called MANLINESS.

2. About your education - N Level? So what? You get a degree also no guarantee you get a better life. What you need is just more job experience. Start out with a shitty job first, gain experience, climb the ladder. Best is start with a job where you have to learn to SELL stuff. The hustle and the grind are the best teachers in life.

Find some things that interest you, play with it, learn more about it, develop skills around it, hang around other experts and learn from them.

By the way, I only Diploma holder but now I got company hiring Degree holders. My business deal with something that I didn't learn in Poly, but more of what I pick up myself and learn myself through years of trial and error.

I don't want to inspire you with feel good vibes. All that bullshit. But definitely you still very young chap got a LOT of time and potential.

Other youngsters your age in their 20's wanna earn 4K a month as their entry level job salary but can't compose proper email can't even ask a senior colleague how to do something, let them dream on, with their credit card debts, weekend clubbing, whatever it is youngsters do nowadays.

Do the shit work in your 20's so by your 30's you're living like a King. Don't worry, by the time you hit 30+ you still have enough energy to enjoy the better life that you are hungry for in your 20's - provided you maintain the right lifestyle energy-wise.

Oh ya... notice I didn't mention any tips on how to score girls, dating, etc.

Take it easy... Ladies love men with a purpose. Devote and focus yourself to building yourself to be the better man you are supposed to be (whatever that bullshit means), let girl chasing be a SIDE distraction from time to time.

Don't overstress - I wanna get a girlfriend, I wanna get a girlfriend, I wanna get a girlfriend - just chill and socialise with girls and be (just) friends with girls first.

An irony of life is that sometimes for somethings the MORE you chase something, the MORE it runs away from you, but if you start to chill, focus on your self, etc, some of these things just naturally start to be attracted to you.

Updates on 2021. 27 year old this year. Still no girlfriend. But many to score 1-2 flings or Viet FB. Last year or last 2 year, fly to vietnam and chat with my online vietnam friend.
So when return back to my airbnb apartment, we had fantastic night. Manage to had my first ever creampie with a woman(she say it okay, cause she will take pills), the feeling fantastic. Sadly covid19 all around the world, wait till everything finish, going to vietnam and find her and enjoy her company.


1. About my Obestiy. I exceed previous 2016 year record, now my weight is about 110kg+. N, now I am diagnose with HBP/Hypertension. Will I change my lifestyle for a healthy lifestyle, as for the time being no way man. Since I am alone as it is, I dont give a damn about changing my life when I dont give a damn about my health. Maybe having a relationship or love might change me. But as for the typical advise on change for yourself, make a change just for yourself to get a healthier or better future, these kind of advises does not affect me as I dont give a damn about it.
The only thing I look forward is having a relationship partner to change my lifestyle, or I will only change for her sake, or for the sake of love. That the only possible solution. For all the naysayers go ahead and say whatever you want, I dont give a damn about it. There a 50/50 I will change once I have a relationship, but telling me to change myself for a healthier and better lifestyle, that will be impossible.

2. My education remain unchanged, still N-Level, and I had no interests in further study or had anything to do with academic study . Living a life base on salary range around 1.8k after cpf is enough for me. I am happy with salary lifestyle, as for promotion and salary increment, if there is good, if there is no, let it be. Working under Certis as Security Officer(Protection Officer).

3. Plan for the future .... save money to buy a BTO flat at 35 year old. Since the law only allow single to buy house at the age of 35 and above. So I have 7-8 more year left to plan for it. At the meanwhile, I will just go find freelance and etc to satisfied my needs. After I have my own house at the age of 35. Then can go buy wife via marriage agency, viet/thai etc of SEA that look or resemblance Chinese or have chinese blood in them. As long as look like Chinese can liao.

Man before 35 year old, have no choice but to be "audition" by Woman when both man and woman in their 20s. It will be our turn to "audition" Woman once we(Man) reach 35 year and above. By that time, say good bye to Woman in their 30s. I will seek a Wife at the age of 21-25.
  #22  
Old 22-07-2021, 03:35 PM
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

can pm me, we can exchange our view on this matter
  #23  
Old 22-07-2021, 03:36 PM
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by randyrockhard View Post
A good friend of mine told me that the basic key to find a girlfriend is to show her your true self.

This may sound simple at first, but it's a sentence full of challenges. First and foremost, you must be be able to define to yourself, the very definition of you.

Are you happy with who you are as a person? Could you look at yourself in the mirror every morning and tell to his face that you like what you're looking at?

If you don't, what makes you think any girl should like you?

At 22, most guys would only focus on their looks/appearance/sweet talk, because at that age, that's probably the only thing they could offer/being expected of them. And if you go for girls of your age, their demands would probably still be similar/within reach by guys your age.

Now, you have the choice to either follow the crowd, or offer something else better?

And btw, reduce your masturbating, it's bad for your energy level and bad for your brains either. Use the energy to be more productive in your life. Seriously.
scare straight away show then people scared away
  #24  
Old 22-07-2021, 07:10 PM
TadaoKumagai TadaoKumagai is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by deematter View Post
can pm me, we can exchange our view on this matter
are you referring to me? Unless you have woman to recommend, if not, I doubt there any point of sharing views. My point of perspective stand firm as it is my life, my path.
  #25  
Old 25-07-2021, 02:45 PM
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randyrockhard randyrockhard is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by TadaoKumagai View Post
are you referring to me? Unless you have woman to recommend, if not, I doubt there any point of sharing views. My point of perspective stand firm as it is my life, my path.
There is a saying one must reach the point of being sick and tired of being sick and tired, before there is a possibility or a change.

When you hit rock bottom, you will know. Take your time, just don't die in the process, okay?

Good luck with your life!
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  #26  
Old 25-07-2021, 03:13 PM
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ibanezjem555 ibanezjem555 is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Not an expert in dating but Bro TS seems to have his life planned out.
Just take care of health bro.. got viet wife, a flat and savings but no health , how to enjoy ? All the best..
  #27  
Old 26-07-2021, 03:24 AM
TadaoKumagai TadaoKumagai is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by ibanezjem555 View Post
Not an expert in dating but Bro TS seems to have his life planned out.
Just take care of health bro.. got viet wife, a flat and savings but no health , how to enjoy ? All the best..
Living with Hypertension is shiok enough, given the fact that it is a lifetime health implication. Can excuse IPPT for life even after the Covid19 excuses or waiver.

Ofcourse down pes will definitely be part of it, but my main primary will be excuse IPPT for Life. Sacrifice my health for 10 year IPPT or lifetime IPPT is fair enough for me.

As for working purpose or etc. Can use Hypertension(Health reason) as valid excuse/reason to dodge physical heavy task or strenous activity if there any. It not like I fake my health when my health implication is legimitate diagnoise by Doctor. What I just do is simply make full advantage of my Hypertension (Health) to dodge the things I dont like.

Beside having Hypertension and daily medication for it, it doesn't really affect lifestyle much. in fact, it help to reduce lot of physical activities such as exercise or ippt etc.
  #28  
Old 26-07-2021, 11:19 AM
iluvbreast iluvbreast is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by TadaoKumagai View Post
Updates on 2021. 27 year old this year. Still no girlfriend. But many to score 1-2 flings or Viet FB. Last year or last 2 year, fly to vietnam and chat with my online vietnam friend...

1. About my Obestiy. I exceed previous 2016 year record, now my weight is about 110kg+. N, now I am diagnose with HBP/Hypertension. Will I change my lifestyle for a healthy lifestyle, as for the time being no way man. Since I am alone as it is, I dont give a damn about changing my life when I dont give a damn about my health....
The only thing I look forward is having a relationship partner to change my lifestyle, or I will only change for her sake, or for the sake of love. That the only possible solution...

2. My education remain unchanged, still N-Level, and I had no interests in further study or had anything to do with academic study . Living a life base on salary range around 1.8k after cpf is enough for me. I am happy with salary lifestyle, as for promotion and salary increment, if there is good, if there is no, let it be. Working under Certis as Security Officer(Protection Officer).

3. Plan for the future .... save money to buy a BTO flat at 35 year old. Since the law only allow single to buy house at the age of 35 and above. So I have 7-8 more year left to plan for it. At the meanwhile, I will just go find freelance and etc to satisfied my needs. After I have my own house at the age of 35. Then can go buy wife via marriage agency, viet/thai etc of SEA that look or resemblance Chinese or have chinese blood in them. As long as look like Chinese can liao.

Man before 35 year old, have no choice but to be "audition" by Woman when both man and woman in their 20s. It will be our turn to "audition" Woman once we(Man) reach 35 year and above. By that time, say good bye to Woman in their 30s. I will seek a Wife at the age of 21-25.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TadaoKumagai View Post
Living with Hypertension is shiok enough, given the fact that it is a lifetime health implication. Can excuse IPPT for life even after the Covid19 excuses or waiver.

Beside having Hypertension and daily medication for it, it doesn't really affect lifestyle much. in fact, it help to reduce lot of physical activities such as exercise or ippt etc.
Hmm...it seems that you have already made your plans...I personally think it is great...

I'm in my mid-forties...still unhappy with the money I take home every month...but that is me, and yes because of that I still worry for money; try to make more....I am not content (and thus not happy) with my lifestyle.

What I don't understand is your request ...Why are you asking for dating advise (which I assume are to date local gals)? Looking at your other thread (and this) it seems that you are already set on Vietnamese women...

And no, unlike some of the fellow samsters here I don't want encourage you to slim down...it is your own body and your life, if you are happy with it then continue...I mean I know people who ride massively powerful motorcycles...and they ride them dangerously...some don't make it to their 30th birthdays...I did talked to them, but their argument is along your line of reasoning - it's their life...and I respect that.
  #29  
Old 26-07-2021, 05:16 PM
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hanysoh hanysoh is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by Harvest View Post
2 things you need to do first:

1. Slim down!

2. Make money!

Do these 2 things successfully then talk about looking for gf...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr_don_juan View Post
I hate fat people. It doesnt matter if u have a huge or small manboobs,you dont respect or love urself,why would any women give u a chance?

The less likable features you have = the more money you need to have to have success with women. Its more of emotional problems mixed with food addiction that creates a severely overweight human being. Thats abnormal.

If you keep repeating the same destructive cycle,with lack of self respect of yourself,you continue to be out of shape.

In reality and truth of the matter is when she wakes up to her friends or society judges they will not allow her to be with a FAT and severely overweight guy.

Hell start going to the gym and knock out those weight.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Triple70 View Post
Fully agree.
And actually.. Simply cutting down on intake.. Will lose weight fast.
As far as i know.. Sg air isnt so nutritious that eating air alone will gain weight.
That's some good advises.

As a matter of fact and it is real, most lady don't like to have fat man for a start especially if that is her first man.
  #30  
Old 28-07-2021, 04:56 AM
TadaoKumagai TadaoKumagai is offline
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Re: [Dating Advise Needed]Online-Offline Process & Procedure

Quote:
Originally Posted by iluvbreast View Post
Hmm...it seems that you have already made your plans...I personally think it is great...

I'm in my mid-forties...still unhappy with the money I take home every month...but that is me, and yes because of that I still worry for money; try to make more....I am not content (and thus not happy) with my lifestyle.

What I don't understand is your request ...Why are you asking for dating advise (which I assume are to date local gals)? Looking at your other thread (and this) it seems that you are already set on Vietnamese women...

And no, unlike some of the fellow samsters here I don't want encourage you to slim down...it is your own body and your life, if you are happy with it then continue...I mean I know people who ride massively powerful motorcycles...and they ride them dangerously...some don't make it to their 30th birthdays...I did talked to them, but their argument is along your line of reasoning - it's their life...and I respect that.
Very simple lor, the thread start like few year back when I still desire for simple and innnocent relationship. Lovey dovey , campus couple romance etc. those fantasy lor.

Few year back still had the mindset of keeping my virgin for my wife, but as time pass, I see not much chances with local. Social Apps, Dating Apps, meet up with locals is either sell insurance or investment plan, got to admit a few of them are above average, got 2 chiobu. It either meetup with quota agenda if not is meetup talk liao, job not good, salary not good, education not good. Talk until like that also no hope liao lor

Now not yet 35. So cannot fully close down the gate for locals mah. As long as it not 0% still got chances mah.
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